A Different Point of View

These last few days my life has been up and down so quickly. Everything changes within a few hours. This hour I felt happy the next hour I felt so sad. It's funny how the wheel of life toast me up and down. I couldn't accept what happen but at the end I realized that it's just a phase of life I need to learn from.

Last week my boyfriend proposed me. I was happy. I saw his eyes when he propose and I really see love there, a love that I believe was sincere for me. Finally I found someone who accept me for who I am. My heart was overwhelmed, I couldn't stop thanking God for it.

But not long after the proposal, my boyfriend started to think that I was lying to him. I couldn't believe someone who loves me would accuse me with such thing. I really love him and have no intention in hurting someone I love in such way. I gave my best effort to fight for this relationship. He finally said his last good bye. I wasn't ready for it. I felt so unfair!!! I even beg for a second chance but never have it. How sad is that? When you fight with everything you have and you end up with nothing.

Yesterday I talked to a marriage consultant. Actually a friend of mine suggested me to meet this couple. He said they are good couple with honest opinion. They will give a different point of view. He did mention that I should be ready for harsh words because they only speak the truth. Here is what she said about my problem:

"I really question his sincerity in the first place... If he can be so immature handling this relationship, it's actually better that you don't marry him. Cause if you leave and join him in his country and he suddenly decides to walk out, you will be left all alone. It's hard to tell a person's real personality by just chatting through video and internet. If he is so emotionally insecure, it's better not to marry him. I know you love him but maybe take a step back and ask yourself if a man behaves like this, is he worth pursuing? You could end up even more hurt if you married him. I know it's hard to suddenly let go of someone you love... very painful. Be strong and move on..."

I finally calm down... no more tears. My heart is in pain, it's very hard to let you go but I have to move on. I know God wants me to experience this because He has a good reason. The good reason is to discover that I am loved by so many people. My parents support me with a big love, they don't blame, they are there for me. My best friends are here to show their true color by standing next to me... covering me from every side so I won't fall. I am so grateful for your love (Nit2x, BlueJasmine, Grace, Imelda, Siska). You are the best of the best. Thank You, Jesus. You are my Savior, my Hope... Thank You for this wonderful experience.You always there for me, Jesus, thank You.

I also wants to thank you to my ex. We have shared a wonderful life for almost 2 years. I'm so grateful for your love, I won't be able to find another love like yours. I never regret the love I felt for you. Like I said before:

Love you once, love you still. Always have, always will.

Thank you for teaching me how to love, showing me what the worlds mean...

Thank you for teaching me how to feel, showing me my emotions...

Thank you for teaching me how to live, putting things in perspective...

Thank you for teaching me how to give and how to take... 

Thank you for everything, Ruben