Health: Fibroadenoma Again

I took a health examination using a tool. The paramedic said, this tool is used by the hospital for people who are afraid to blood and hypodermic needle. The test is short but pretty amazed with the result. There are several result that need to be noted.

First, I have too many nicotine in my lung. I don't know how it got there as I don't smoke. Maybe this is the cause of my difficulty to breathe, but still need a further examination.

Second, there's a sign of Fibroadenoma. I have removed my fibroadenoma long time ago. The oncologist told me that the tumor might appear again. I used to check up every year, but since the relocation of the hospital, I hardly do it anymore. I tried to sense the lump but I can't feel it, maybe it was too small. I am really afraid that I have to do another surgery again this year. What to do? What to do?

Lesson: January - Meeting Month

January will always be a busy month for me. Meeting and meeting all the time. This January is the busiest month than before. Usually in January, we have 3 annual meetings in the office, but probably this time only 2 annual meeting. The other one will be held on February.

First Annual Meeting

The first one is the annual meeting of a sister company in the company group. My task is to summarize the meeting and to create fun games. Meeting was held in Jogjakarta, I like this city. The weather wasn't friendly cause we are having raining season. Two days of meeting which always end late at night. It was difficult to stay focus with such long hours of meeting. One of my job was to make ice-breaker, so everyone can be fresh and focus again on the meeting. 

It wasn't easy to find a good ice-breaker games. We need to think games that can build sense of belonging and team work. My coworker and I managed to give good ice-breakers during the meeting. We laughed, we have fun, we can focus well during the meeting. Beside ice-breakers, we also created an Amazing Race. We made them run and do many things, started from the hotel to Ambarukmo Mall, then to Candi Prambanan and Candi Boko. Tired but all of us have fun. Really enjoyed this sister company annual meeting. Satisfied!!!

Second Annual Meeting 

This was the meeting of the big company. Main task is to summarize the meeting but as a senior secretary I have many tasks. I am the organizing committee. I arranged the meals, chose the catering service, the snack. I gave the ice-breakers too, well I used the previous ice-breaker of first meeting, hehe. I am also the steering committee coordinator. So, I have to arrange my other steering committee and made the final summary of the meeting. Super tired, as the meeting ended very late at night, for 4 nights in a row. Tired physically, tired mentally. 

Too many tasks made me less focus. There are several out of hand situations. Like the catering was late, the lack of food, the other small meeting that want to change the result in every time, etc. There are frictions in the whole committee. I even lose my control and got angry to coworkers due their lack of responsibility. This was a hard one. 

At the end, everything went well. Thanks be to God. Thank You, Lord for providing me with strength. I couldn't do it without YOU.  

Now, my stamina is really at the lowest level. I have a stiff neck, hard to breathe, blood from nose, headache, gastric tummy, super sleepy, super tired. I need a break, need a vacation... 

Lesson to learn:

I need to improve my communication skill again, as I found out that my coworker didn't follow my order on how to finish the task I gave to them. I do like their initiative but their lack of responsibility is really a barrier to the team. 

As I quote from the main theme of the meeting: "ONE WORD, ONE ACT". 

Really need to implement this one in the team. We need everyone in the team to have one vision and act together to fulfill the vision.

Picture source:

http://comeniuspiazza.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/meeting-image21.jpg

Prayer: A Father's Prayer

For this last several days I dreamed about my father and end up crying. I can't remember the dreams very much in detail but I remember what I said to him before I woke up. I said to him, "Why you go away, papa?" and when he said that he need to go, I said to him, "Please don't go, papa!" 

As I reflected my dream, I can only say that deep in my heart I haven't wholeheartedly let go of him. We live so far away, so we hardly meet. It makes the separation with him easier to bear. But the guilt of not being able to help him makes me ask those questions in my dream. We can't control our dream, I believe it solely speak the truth of our longing. 

In a deep longing for him, I opened our chat history. I read it one by one and it made me cry again. I was stunned to read one of our conversation about me asking him to pray. That time I was very sad due a broken relationship with my ex. Here is his prayer in original language: 

+ Dalam nama Bapa dan Putra dan Roh Kudus. Amin.

Ya Allah Bapa yang penuh kasih, dengan penuh keyakinan aku datang di hadapan-Mu, sambil percaya bahwa Engkau menginginkan kesejahteraan dan kebahagiaan putri kami. Penuhilah hatinya dengan Roh-Mu, sehingga ketika putri kami berhadapan dengan kesulitan dan kecemasan, ia dapat mengingat cinta-Mu yang abadi, dan percaya akan janji bahwa Engkau akan hadir bersamanya. Ya Yesus, hadirlah bersama putri kami, dan berilah ia keberanian dan kekuatan. Bunda Maria, bunda kami, jadilah pengantara untuk mendapatkan rahmat-rahmat yang sangat putri kami butuhkan saat ini dari Bapa di Surga dan dari Putra-Mu, Yesus.
Amin.

+ Dalam nama Bapa dan Putra dan Roh Kudus. Amin.

The translation of his prayer:

+ In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
O God Loving Father, with confidence I come before Thee, as I believe that You desire the welfare and happiness of our daughter. Fill her heart with your Spirit, so when our daughter deals with difficulty and anxiety, she can remember Your love is immortal, and believe in the promise that You will be with her. O Jesus, please be with our daughter, and give her courage and strength. Mary, our Mother, please be a mediator to obtain graces that our daughter need right now from the Father in Heaven and from Thy Son, Jesus.
Amen.
+ In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Oh, papa.... I really miss you... :'(